Sunday, June 05, 2005

It's My Bliss And I'll Complain If I Want To

I'm a nice guy with a loving family. I have a mortgage, two cars, a lovely wife, 3 healthy and good children, and a dog who greets me when I come home each night. I have a wonderful job with great coworkers who I call my friends. I have so much more than millions will ever have. Yes, I am blessed. That said...I'm hot and I'm cranky. My AC is out and I come home to discomfort. My haven is not hospitable. It's too hot. No longer under warranty for labor, it turns out that my unit is the eyesore of its industry. Great. My choice: Save up for the $600 it'll cost to fix an unreliable unit? Or save up for 6 or 7 times that amount and get a better brand put in? (Warning: I feel a rant coming up.)

  • I wake up this morning to my cherub falling off of my bed. He's fine but screaming from the shock and fear of falling.
  • Then my wife informs me that my work check had an error on it. $40 for a week's worth of work? I don't think so.
  • Did I mention it's hot in the house? My general crankiness is well on its way now.
  • My hero/father comes over but I have no time to visit b/c I have to go to work.
  • I go to work. We are not busy so I am at peace with not making a lot of money today, but I get drama anyway. Someone has told a petty lie about me and now my integrity is questioned by someone whose friendship I value.
  • I come home at midnight to a loving home which is, as previously mentioned, hot, hot, hot. My poor family had to deal with this all day? Maybe I had the good day instead. At least I was in a cool, comfortable hotel all day.
In truth, one factor to my discontent might be that I spent a portion of my morning watching booktv on cspan. (Yes, ladies. I am a hot date.) General envy seemed to find its way into my subconscious, watching authors and editors discussing writing and the marketing of writing. I could have watched them talk all day long. I have gone through my day, stressed about money and pissy about something I can't quite put my finger on. I realize now that I know I am not doing what I am supposed to be doing. I like it, it is serving its purpose, and I am dedicated to doing it well each day, but it shouldn't be my life's work.

I'm good, but I could be so much better.

1 comment:

Sam Davidson said...


I'd love to get together sometime and talk about working somewhere you really don't like. I feel the same way. The hotel has its ups and downs, but there is a whole list of things I'm more cut out for or would enjoy more. But it's tough to deal with the stress of having to do something you sort of don't like.