Should I Just Watch TV Like A Normal Person?

I skipped out on plans to see Webb Wilder tonight and just came home instead. I vacuumed, washed dishes and washed clothes. Now I'm at a loss. What do people do when they have a night alone to themselves?

I own a television. Watching television is what I've heard the experts call a lean-back experience, as opposed to surfing the web, which they call a lean-forward experience. I'm looking at the listings online (and leaning forward) and I'm still not sure.

A show called Las Vegas is on (Quotes or italics for a show name? I've never learned.), but I don't think it would appeal to me. My dream used to be to move out to Vegas and be a bellman there where I could make some serious money. I was attracted to the glitz and lights and thought a move out there would make me more interesting an exciting. But now I'm 37 and I know myself pretty well. I'm a quiet guy who likes his peace and solitude. I think I'd do better in states like Iowa or Montana (Hi Leesa!). Beers and a good internet connection keep me perfectly happy. And just think of those night skies!

But back to Nashville and what's on TV: In Arena Football, there is a wildcard playoff game between the Orlando Predators and the Philadelphia (our owner whose name is Jon Bon Jovi will probably be on your TV screen if you watch us play) Soul. I like football of any kind. I may watch that.

Larry King is interviewing Robin Williams, but I just can't bring myself to watch Larry King. Already famous for his softball interviews, I hear that his interview with Paris Hilton was a joke. I heard that he asked Paris what she did with her time in jail and she responded that she read books. It would seem that a natural follow-up question would be, "What books did you read?" Nope. He went on to the next dull query. Anyway...

Bad Girls From Valley High is on WUXP. The title sounds promising but the description is dull, dull, dull.

WWE on WNAB (Is that the WB that everyone talks about?) - No thanks. I get my wrestling through osmosis in the employee cafeteria. Insert iPod earbuds here.

After The Sunset on TBS - Oops. I was excited but then realized it wasn't the Ethan Hawke / Julie Delpy movie. Next.

The Cardinals play the Reds - I'm done with baseball. I don't care. I do not follow the game. (Can someone please tell me tomorrow if my Reds won?)

Something's on Lifetime, but I bet the guy did something bad to the girl. Not interested.

The Godfather II - Hmmm... I think we have a winner.

What A Girl Wants and She Gets What She Wants are playing at the same time. If you're high, this will seem wild and profound. (I'm not high.)

Rock Star is on VH1 Classic - The Godfather II just got some competition. I wish I was Mark Wahlberg. I like Jennifer Aniston, too.

Memoirs of a Geisha - Pass.

Wild Bill starring Jeff Bridges and Ellen Barkin - Here's the line I love:

[Jane surprises Bill by giving him a wet sloppy kiss]
Calamity Jane: Just for old times' sake.
[Bill wipes off his mouth]
Calamity Jane: You wipin' it off?
James Butler 'Wild Bill' Hickok: No. I'm rubbin' it in.

Great line. Anyway, Rock Star wins. (And Bon Jovi's "Livin' On A Prayer" plays in the background as Mark rides in a limo to a huge mansion.)