Wednesday, October 03, 2007

How To Really Wake Up (Must Have Kids)

Four easy steps:
  1. Stumble into living room and sit in chair half-asleep while the children play.
  2. Shuffle into kitchen like zombie and make chocolate milk in cup with no lid for daughter. (The rule: If the cup has no lid, the child must drink it in kitchen.)
  3. Return to living room chair and proceed to read blogs while paying no attention to daughter's total disregard for the rules as they relate to cups with no lids.
  4. Launch laptop and self upwards with a yelp toward the ceiling as an overturned cup of cold chocolate milk (with no lid) finds itself totally in lap and onto chair.
Related: How To Really Clean A Chair? I just scrub hard with wet cloths and hope for the best.


The Middle Child said...

Dude, you forgot the whole stepping on a wayward Lego on your way into the kitchen.

newton said...

that sounds oddly similar to my essay entitled "how to almost kill yourself and your dog while spilling a full glass of whiskey because you both tried to move the same direction at the same time twice to avoid stepping on or being stepped on."

still working on the title...